Sheryl Jesin


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Do you believe people are doing their best?

I shared last week that I am currently listening to the audio version of Brene Brown’s new book “Rising Strong”.

There have been so many amazing nuggets of information that I am learning from this book.  I plan to share some of them with you here!

Brene asks a question in the book:  “Do you believe that in general, people are doing their best?”.

I’d like to know – Do YOU think people are doing their best?

This is a tough question!  My knee jerk repsonse to this is no – everyone can do better.  I often think that I can do better – I can be more patient with my kids, kinder to my husband, more efficient with my time, a better coach, daughter, friend etc.

Brene shares the answer of her husband – he said that if we believe that people are doing their best, it will make our lives more peaceful.

How does this work?  If you start believing that other people are doing their best, you can stop judging them.  You can start accepting them for who they are, and showing more kindness to them – and this will make you feel at peace.

For example – if my kids are jumping on the bed and running around screaming and chasing each other and basically having fun but driving me crazy before bed, I can chose to be annoyed and frustrated with them.  On the flipside, I can assume that they are doing their best.  They are acting like kids and maybe I haven’t created a restful bedtime atmosphere – maybe I haven’t specifically spelled out my bedtime expectations.  Once I stop judging their behaviour, I can enjoy the moment I am having with them – and perhaps even receive some joy from their enthusiastic and fun-filled spirits.

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A peaceful moment after crazy bedtime shenanigans

Brene asked hundreds of people this question in her research for the book.  She learned that people who answer yes – people who believe others are trying their best – are people who set boundaries in their lives, who practice self-care, and who take care of themselves.  Because they take care of themselves, they are able to extend compassion towards others.  It is hard to extend compassion to other people when you are burnt out, putting yourself last and doing things you don’t want to do.  When that happens – you tend to believe that other are NOT doing their best.

I know as busy moms, we tend to not set clear boundaries, overextend ourselves and become resentful.  I definitely do this from time to time!

I know that I want to truly believe that other people are doing their best – and I want people to believe that about me too.  I want my life to be more peaceful.  Brene reminded me about the importance of self-care.   I am going to continue to work on adding practices of self care to my life and only saying yes to things I truly want to do.

I’d love to know what you think about this topic.  Do you think people are doing their best?

I’m putting together my next 21 day health and fitness challenge.  We start January 4th.  If you have been wanting to start taking better care of yourself – this is the perfect opportunity!  Join my supportive community of women who support each other on their journies towards better health.  Be a part of our group – work out everyday for 30 mins from the comfort of your home, learn about portion controlled clean eating and enrich your mind, body and spirit!  If you want more info, please shoot me an email at sheryl@ikor.com and I will get back to you ASAP with the details about the challenge. 

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Should you wake up at 5am? Yes!

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A couple weeks ago, I completed a 5 day early wakeup challenge.

I challenged myself to wake up five days in a row at 5am.

Why did I do this?

I have noticed that when I make an effort to wake up earlier than the kids, my day goes much more smoothly.

I feel relaxed.  I feel at peace.  I feel energized!  I feel like I can tackle anything.

Just having a few moments of silence before my very noisy household wakes up can make the difference between a good day and a bad day.

You might be wondering – what do I do when I wake up so early?

Here’s how it goes:

  1.  Read for 15 mins – Every day I set a goal for myself to read for at least 15 mins.  And I’m talking reading a book OR listening to an audiobook…scrolling Facebook or surfing the net does not count.  Lately I have been into non-fiction personal development books.  I like books that are motivational, inspiring and that can help me become a better parent, wife, coach and human being.  The book I am reading right now is called Rising Strong by Brene Brown.  I am actually listening to it on Audible as an audio book.  Brene Brown herself is the narrator and I love hearing it in her actual voice.  She is a social scientiest who has ignited a global conversation on courage, vulternability, shame and worthiness.  She shares stories of people being brave, failing and getting back up.  I highly recommend this book to anyone wanting to learn more cultivating wholeheartedness and rising up from struggles.
  2. Drink my pre-workout drink and then workout for 30 mins – Let’s be honest – it isn’t easy to get going at 5am…I am not going to lie.  But – when I drink my pre-workout drink it gives me a burst of energy so that I can power through my workout.  I workout for 30 mins in my living room.  It is dark at 5am and I am glad to not have to leave my nice warm house to go to a gym or a class.   It feels SO GOOD to move first thing in the morning and I like to workout then because my workouts are important to me, and I know I always have time for the things I do first.  Plus, it is nice to take a shower right after and get dressed instead of sitting in my pyjamas or sweaty workout clothes all morning/day.
  3. Make my to-do list for the day – 5 am is a great time to get organized for the day.  I write down my to-do list so that when pockets of free time arise during the day, I am ready to be productive.  I need to write things down to organize my brain, and plus it feels awesome to check things off!
  4. Take a few minutes to express gratitude and write down positive affirmations – Both of these things are daily habits that I have been working on.  I take a couple minutes when I wake up and also before I go to sleep to list out things that I am grateful for.  This can be as simple as having fresh food, a house to live in, and three healthy kids.  I am amazed by how this practice makes each and every day a little bit happier.  I also take a couple of minutes to write down positive affirmations.  A few affirmations that I have been enjoying lately are: ” I deserve and receive massive amounts of love every moment of every day”.  “I am one with the universe – the universe is awesome and so am I”.  “My heart is open and love pours in and out”.  And – “I respond with wisdom, love, firmness and self control when my children trigger me”.  I know these might sound cheesy – but try reciting these each morning and see how your day improves!

So what do you think?  Could your day improve by waking up a little bit earlier and making time for things that are important to you?

I truly belive that what you do first thing in the morning sets the tone for the rest of your day and even for the rest of your life.  Do you agree?